Today I was working on an assignment, and it was taking much longer than it should've been. You know when you're in a time crunch and spending way too much time on something that doesn't deserve that proportion of your functionality? And you know that you should be speeding up the efficiency, but that actually just slows you down? Yeah, that happened to me today, and I was getting frustrated with myself and just wanted to enter your haven and get a McChicken with an Oreo McFlurry (with a side of those fries which will never rot and instead slow down the passage through my intestines).
But guess what - I won this time. Yeah honey, beat that, I controlled myself, ha!
- listened to some empowering songs such as my favourite song since my childhood - Des'ree: You Gotta Be, and my favourite song to jam to as I imagine how long my locs will be in 5 years - Willow Smith: Whip My Hair
- danced in front of my mirror like I was a musical sensation performing a sold out tour...it's Aliyo b***h
- taught a Zumba routine I used to teach as I visualized the memories of my participants who enjoyed themselves so much
- My body felt awesome as I moved to the music, and felt the rhythms and every beat of these amazing fusions of creativity. It felt so good to stop looking at that computer screen for awhile and get my molecules of living jiving!
As I ate my Christmas-coloured snack, I wondered why I even wanted to jump into your arms and shove you in my mouth. Turns out, you and I have a long history, so it's hard for me to resist you when you creep up on me. In my childhood (back when your toys were actually good), "treat night" meant you, and I would get excited for your delicious treat 1-2x a week. Then, when I moved to the city where I lived for 13 years and grew up in, you always had a location within walking distance. Your first one was literally across from my complex, but then got burned down. However, shortly after a revamped one popped up in the exact same plaza.
And when I was working multiple jobs and cared more about saving my money than my health (lack of sleep included), you were faithfully nearby, sometimes in the building I worked in, so that I'd never have to worry about starving (well, at least psychologically, because you didn't provide me with nutrition, that's for sure..thanks for that by the way). And now, you're less than a 10 minute walk from where I'm studying to become a Naturopathic Doctor. And you have to be all up in my space, situating yourself right outside of my gym, tempting me as I walk to the subway, knowing that I'm not too excited to eat that homemade meal in my fridge that I've already eaten 3 days in a row.
But guess what: today, I chose myself, I chose to preserve my health. And I'm very well aware you beat me over a hundred times in the past (and may catch a few in the future), but all it takes is one day to begin a change. Get that ball rolling down the mountain. And believe me, once my ball gains momentum, you will miss receiving all of the hard-earned money you lured from me, and you will be devastated when I finally get rid of your toxicity laying deep in my fat deposits which refuse to leave (grrr). And worst of all, you'll be heart-broken from the mental hold you'll cease to have upon me.